Read this for the first time this morning: 

 https://www.theparisreview.org/blog/2013/08/08/it-can-be-embarrassing-to-love-dorothea/

“ She reminded me, gently, of the value of holding my tongue when my boiling blood was instructing me not only to speak but to throw some dishes in the bargain. She was an example of equanimity that comes hard-won, one that made good behavior seem not sappy and sentimental but fed by strength and understanding.”